i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
