have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
