I just saw a hot homeless man
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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