Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
