Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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