We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize