Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I queefed so loud it echoed.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
