i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize