Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Randomize
