Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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