is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
