sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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