Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Do vagina's smell?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
