Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
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i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
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She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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