That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
We talked him into tasing himself.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Randomize
