We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize