Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Randomize
