Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
