the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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