She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
