ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
