Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
