so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
