it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize