Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
The beer is more important than you right now.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
