God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize