Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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