I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize