their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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