I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
