he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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