So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
