I'm jealous of your bromance
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
