he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
