Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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