8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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