If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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