Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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