He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize