Your face is a jimmy john
North Korea, Best Korea!
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
