we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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