there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Randomize
