I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
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