I wannas sexs uuuuu
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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