Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
