chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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