I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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