Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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