he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize