WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
