They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
