You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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